These past two weeks have given me insight into the person I want to be and the type of individual I want to live as. I consider one is the practical "I can be this type of human" and the other is idealist; factoring in all the bests, greatest, and mosts of my life into this transformative magic being. I recognize...fully--believe it or not, that I may not EVER get to that idealist point.
Brown has taught me so much. It taught me to not second-guess my ability to be a good supervisor. I was scared to the core that I was going to single-handedly send these lovely humans on a one-way trip to a deserted island off the Arctic Sea. So far, I have managed not to do that, but after having hours of conversations with them, they renewed me in a faith that I constantly find myself losing. I am hoping that this means it is here to stay for a while...I hope.
If I said that this semester was not the hardest one I have ever encountered in my life, I would be lying. Not because the material or grading is any more difficult than I have experienced before, but because of the fact that I am learning things that I will use to address students as a professional, and that is something that both excites and scares me.
Take the three classes I had this semester: Master's Seminar, History of American Higher Education, and Higher Education Policy. Master's Seminar focused on writing and learning about the foundations of Critical Theory as it relates to the issues and problems facing Higher Education today. History of American Higher Education forced us to think critically about the history of higher education through an intersectional lens of DisCrit, the intersection of disability and Critical Race Theory. Finally, Higher Education Policy focused on learning about the very policies and procedures that impact, have impacted, and will impact the future of post-secondary learning (looking at you HEA Reauthorization).
These three classes, all very different from each other, all managed to speak to my practitioner-based mind as well as my scholarly mind. To be honest, I never really felt like that would happen. Here it is mid-December and I am finally giving into the magic that this graduate program has. We have a lot of work to do as college administrators in the next coming decades. We better get some rest and be ready to fight because this new era of post-secondary education is coming and we are looking to take it into the hands of something greater, something better, and something that will truly and inclusively support our students.